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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23299621">Fanning The Flames - South African Airways Flight 2020</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/eliora/pseuds/eliora'>eliora</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Best Song Ever - One Direction (Music Video), K-pop, Mayday | Air Crash Investigation (TV), One Direction (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>2020, Airplane, BLM, Black Lives Matter, Boeing 747, COVID-19, Coronavirus, Fire, George Floyd, I CAN'T BREATHE, K-Pop - Freeform, Mesozoic mammals, NTSB, Noah's Ark, Non-binary character, Other, Outer Space, Plane Crash, Predicted the future, Protests, Quarantine, Secwepemc, Social Media, South Africa, Submarines, Two-Spirit, Underwater, Vegetarians &amp; Vegans, Worst Year Ever, fanning the flames, jurassic period, mesozoic, spaceship, year 2020</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 12:15:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>12,583</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23299621</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/eliora/pseuds/eliora</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>South African Airways Flight 2020 was a regularly scheduled flight from Ktuy Shek Spaceport, Best Song Ever, to South Pole Spaceport, South Africa. On November 28, 12644458987, the Penisforce 747 Cham, son of Noah named Helderberg servicing the flight experienced catastrophic in-flight fire in the cargo area, and crashed into an unnamed planet near star Papey Gavna, killing all 7.68 billion people on board.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Fanning The Flames - South African Airways Flight 2020</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>South African Airways Flight 2020 is a scheduled flight from Ktuy Shek Spaceport, Best Song Ever, to South Pole Spaceport, South Africa.</p><p>At the spaceport, people are looking at an unusual spaceship next to the 747. </p><p> - What is this and what is it doing with our spaceplane? - asks Valery, a passenger. </p><p>Valery is a soft, redhead mavka with tangerine eyes who is returning home to HIP 828056 from a photoshoot in the Best Song Ever's fields and beaches. She is a non-romantic girl who criticizes concept of love and often calls it an "illegitimate social institution". She has a tall, soft and peachy build. The mavka uses this flight because of her SAA flyer program as opposed to directly flying to the States. </p><p> - I have no idea. Probably loading something. - says a random passenger standing next to her, Joena. She is a light-skinned and short girl who likes blue and grey clothes. </p><p>The 747's upper round section in the back opens and what seems like cargo, begins to load. </p><p> - This is a Combi? - asks Valery.</p><p> - Hm... this is Cham, not Combi. Although they are related. - says Joena.</p><p>However, the animals begin to enter the rear section of the plane. The account is to fill the plane with 50 males and 50 females of every species on a given planet, plus genetic treatment for diversity. In addition, there are also 540 million World War 2-level persons in the passenger cabin. Their home star has started expanding into a red giant faster than is predicted by stellar evolution laws. Because of this, SAA used a Ham spaceship to save these people from expanding star. The temperature at their home planet is already 41 degrees water. (105.8 °F). The spaceline is abbreviated SAA instead of SAS, because it originally was an airline.</p><p> - This is a weird insertion at the time, the star Simimon is expanding into a red giant way too quickly. - says the animal loading master Kniv Taik Sul.</p><p>- Check if every species is present and all the planetary persons are instructed about the rules of intergalactic flight. - adds Keip Kaeq Mon, a cargo engineer.</p><p>- Instructions: given, species: all accounted for. I will also remind the flight crew to keep an eye on these people. - Kniv replies.</p><p>- Notbutbutand also check that species are transported not as cargo, but according to their needs. I mean we don't want another Roskosmos 612. - says Keip.</p><p>The flight is starting to get delayed. The crew has missed their takeoff slot because cargo and species workers are having a difficult time sorting things out. Passengers are starting to fidget and get nervous a bit. The aircrew is already on board and the pilots are in the cockpit. </p><p> - I am going to go and quickly buy a snack. - says Valery. I am not sure for how long this plane is going to get delayed.</p><p> - Okay. </p><p>One group of people on board the spacecraft are the exchange team for social sciences, along with a group of eizrex mavkae, a species that is emerging. They are travelling to the star South Africa for a camping event and a month of sociology. Amnit Sharon is a short-haired they/them mavka who is going to be fried on campfire, because they wanted themselves to go out like this.</p><p>As soon as Valery runs away from the gate to the spaceport cafe, boarding to the flight is open because the crew had already sorted things out. The people start entering through the gate and into the spaceplane. As the passengers are seated, spacecraft quickly begins to push away from the gate in order to make up for the time lost at cargo ordering. </p><p>Meanwhile Valery is ordering some fast food. She is standing in front of a stand that says "Shawarma: Israeli, Arabic, Persian, Turkic".</p><p> - One Arabic shawarma mini, please. </p><p> - With meat or with falafel?</p><p> - With meat please. And with white sauce on top.</p><p> - Okay. That would be $2.80.</p><p>Meanwhile the peach girl is waiting for her food to get ready, at 19:01, South African Airways Flight 2020 takes off from Ktuy Shek Spaceport. Ouch. The plane turns around the curvature of the star and continues in the direction of closest galaxies.</p><p>For the first 8 out of 13 hours of the flight, the crew consists of captain Stefan Vilccéinskéij (pronounced "Vilchynsky"), first officer Sөhөr den Tugai, and flight engineer Asen Hréitsai<br/>
For the first 8 out of 13 hours of the flight, the crew consists of captain Stefan Vilccéinskéij (pronounced "Vilchynsky"), first officer Sөhөr den Tugai, and flight engineer Asen Hréitsai. The relief flight crew for the remaining 5 hours is captain Dawie Ӛys, first officer Shinear Prihodko, and flight engineer Ytaina van der Sans.</p><p>The night flight to South Pole is very pleasant, as the captain Vilccéinskéij talks to space traffic control.</p><p> - Sassy 2020 heavy, Best Song Ever.</p><p>- Best Song Ever, Sassy 2020 heavy, you are cleared to climb and maintain speed level 330.</p><p>- Climb and maintain speed level 330.</p><p>- Turn heading right ascension 218, declination 34. </p><p>- Right ascension 218, declination 34, Roger.</p><p>Valery realizes she has missed her flight. She goes to the refund deck, although the flight was free per her program. She talks to the person behind.</p><p> - I missed SAA2020. Is there any other flight I can find?</p><p> - Were you intending to take a connection?</p><p> - Yes, to HIP 828056.</p><p> - We have a few alternatives, American 142, United 600, Delta 418, Trans World 772, Pan Am 90.</p><p> - Pan Am 90 is a 747?</p><p> - Yes. 747-002. Very old and vintage plane that has proven itself over millions of years.</p><p> - Can I spend my SAS free pass on this Pan Am flight?</p><p> - Yes. At the cost of 10% payment. </p><p> - Alright. </p><p>Valery exchanges her ticket for a pass to the Pan Am Flight 90. The plane is a normal 747, and it is done per Pan Am's stylistic of right generation. The reason why Pan Am keeps flying old planes, is because if they retired them it would leave a lot of future customers born in the wrong generation, and it would be a huge blow to the company's image. </p><p>Pan Am 90 arrives, in pansexual livery and with a name Clipper Canvas Of Life. The boarding is pretty usual. Valery takes a business class window seat on the 84th floor of the plane.</p><p>Hours later, SAA2020 is cruising at a speed of 45'000 cents (1.05 Mly/s). The crew have turned the general lights down to a very dark-lampy setting, so that the less developed species would see galaxies in space and get used to the intergalactic flying. And so everyone can sleep. The reason why it is the star of South Africa that is receiving the life of the planet, is because 610 years prior some people have accidentally greatly influenced that planet's mythology and religion by abducting 1 person from there. Now in a sense, they are owning up to the accident.</p><p>In the cabin, there are 7'682'748'511 people, which is about half the spaceship's capacity. 541'309'666 are from the Earth-like planet. One of the passengers is Cherri Hyeon (Hyeon Yi-Jin), a mavka who is a k-pop idol in the girl band Theanotherium and who is travelling to SA for a holiday. She is short, has blue eyes and blonde hair, and she is known for being one of the non-Korean idols. Right next to her are group of students from the music academy of Sobel, a suburb of South Pole, who are travelling home after their own performances, but joined at Ktuy Shek.</p><p>For the reference, Best Song Ever are anglicized ideographs and don't actually mean "best song ever".</p><p>In the night, a student of musical school starts a conversation with her.</p><p> - Hi... would it be okay if we talk?</p><p> - Yes, sure. - she smiles.</p><p> - My name is Miems, and yours?</p><p> - I'm Cherri or Yi-Jin.</p><p> - What do you do, who are you as a person?</p><p> - I like soft songs, and drawing. And you?</p><p> - I am a classical pianist, coming home back form travel. I have an rareness quotient of 272, if I wasn't a narcissist I would be perfect. Would you like to exchange Instagram?</p><p> - Yeah, sure :)</p><p>Miems looks at Cherri's follower count and sees 22 trillion people. </p><p> - Wow... you are famous?</p><p> - Yes. And you are not narcissistic, come on. You are self-bragging but narcissists are usually the last to admit that they are narcissistic after the all the evidence confronted, because narcissism comes from lack of sense of self. You have the opposite.</p><p> - And what do you do?</p><p> - I am a k-pop idol, well you can see :)</p><p> - K-pop... never heard of this. Does it have musical diversity? Let me take a listen. </p><p> - Sure.</p><p>Miems listens to a song from Theanotherium and she is somewhat astounded by simplicity. </p><p> - Seems a little unusual and too simply constructed. I would say quite boring from a sheet music point of view. Do you actually enjoy what you are doing or are you just doing it for money?</p><p> - Well, both. This is meant to be soft, girly, and simplistic. Not all music has to be hard and trying to outpace every other piece of music.</p><p> - Oh. What do you do besides k-pop?</p><p> - Modelling, makeup, idk what much more...</p><p> - I do things like kayaking, tetrational calculus, obviously I mentioned playing the piano, and I also have been studying lesbian sexology and erotology.</p><p> - Wow. Amazing.</p><p> - Your interests are amazing too.</p><p>Flight 2020 is flying in intergalactic space over a communication-dead zone. Some of the astronomers from the original planet have gathered in the back of the plane and are making observations of galaxies. On the planet, they were just discovering the concept of galaxy. Flight attendants became their astronomy supervisors. </p><p> - Is this what we are living and what we are made of?</p><p> - Yes. - says the flight attendant.</p><p> - And every galaxy is made of pale blue dots, that are just remote pieces of dust suspended in sunbeams. - describes the planetary astronomer.</p><p> - But it combines together to make pieces of light. - says flight attendant Varalk.</p><p> - And those pieces of light eventually were living in massive stars and built the world we have today. - says another flight attendant Petoenia. </p><p> - Okay, let's be quiet because it is 2 AM.</p><p>----------</p><p>Most people in the cabin are asleep, except for 24 members of the YoengBlood (YB) cover dance team based in Snowflacc, HIP 828056. They are travelling for a so-called "honeymoon" in South Pole. This honeymoon has no marriage context, rather it is a month where members of cover dance team spend time together.</p><p> - What are your plans for the next Comic Con, which will be in Inbaratta? - Felix asks everyone </p><p> - Unless it somehow gets bomb threats, I am going. - says Joher.</p><p> - Bomb threats? At Comic Con? Is this something new? - asks Lemma. </p><p> - The social phenomenon isn't new, it has just reached Comic Con this time. The phenomenon is known as Incel Intifada, although there are several like it, it primarily affects Israel, it is done by... - and then Joher gets interrupted.</p><p> - Stop, I'll explain easier. Some people weren't getting their dicks wet so they started bombing things. Obviously a very normal and very nice reaction. - explains Felix.</p><p> - Oh. - sighs Tamata. But I think we need to listen to Joher's story because they also wanted to say something. </p><p> - Basically there was heightened security at Comic Con some 7000 years ago in Israel, because of this "Incel Intifada"... a weird word combination. I heard this so many times, it got stuck in my head. Obviously they aren't the only one, but it is strange.</p><p> - They missed the perfect opportunity to call this "Incefada". - says Tamata.</p><p> - They missed a lot of opportunities to be honest. - adds Kamul.</p><p>Also onboard is Jermaine Anquis, who is a mashup artist. Ze has posted a 12'644'458'987 year end mashup of 171 songs using the spacecraft's in-flight internet.</p><p>At 3 AM, the relief crew replaces the main crew. Stefan gets up and goes to the crew's rest area. Soon later, Dawie comes back. </p><p> - Everything good? - asks Ӛys.</p><p> - Fine, captain. - Asen relays to him.  - Ready to take over? </p><p> - Yes, thanks.</p><p>Dawie checks the instruments and says: "All good, you are cleared to rest". After that, Asen and Sөhөr leave the cockpit, while Shinear and Ytaina enter. </p><p>The lights in the cabin are up to an extent, but relatively dim. </p><p>The members of the YoengBlood cover dance team discovered that there is a k-pop idol on board, and moved close to her.</p><p> - Oh hi, you're Cherri?</p><p> - Yes.</p><p> - We are from YoengBlood dance team, and we would love to get to know you.</p><p> - Oh sure!</p><p> - I am Felix, this is Lemma, this is Joher. </p><p> - I am Tamata, this is Nastyeol (Nastya and Yeol combined), and this is Kamul. And besides, why would you want to fly a normal warp?</p><p> - I am just tired of this star business and I want to be non-famous for a week. This is why I am not flying private jet, but this. </p><p>Then, somewhat before 4 in the morning, smoke alarm breaks the calm of the night. It is for the 1st pallet of cargo, which is directly behind the passenger seats. The flight attendant Andre Chicxloeb enters the cargo hold, and sees a massive inferno with animals running away. </p><p>Flight attendant Skamle calls the cockpit over the intercom and says "It's bad."</p><p> - Sounds like bring me another bottle over there. - says Shinear. This is a phrase with Selkupnam grammar imprinted.</p><p>Andre sprays the fire with fire extinguishing material, but it ran out very fast. He drops the bottle of fire extinguisher, goes in a movement car towards the cabin, and asks: </p><p> - Bring me another bottle.</p><p>Flight attendant Jәrәd Plaatjies brings a barage of bottles to Andre, and he begins the rage against the fire. </p><p>Then, a massive clacking sound begins in the cockpit, like a bubble wrap.</p><p>- The circuit breaker panel popped as well. - says Asen, the main flight engineer.</p><p>- Wha... - says Shinear and gets interrupted.</p><p>- Check the breaker panel, the circuit breaker panel popped as well. - explains Stefan.</p><p>Dawie asks Stefan to go into the cargo hold and help fight the fire. Vilccéinskéij gets into the horizontal elevator (also movement car) and rushes to the backside of the plane. The YB members and Yi-Jin look at the car in wondering, as do the group of eizrex mavkae with exchange group on the other side of the aisle. The smoke begins pouring into the passenger cabin. </p><p>At 3:48, next to galaxy NCV-82924BI, Flight 2020 calls the space traffic control on the blue supergiant star Papey Gavna, which is as big to the Sun and as the Sun is to Earth. </p><p> - Papey Gavna, this is Sassy 2020. </p><p> - Sassy 2020, Papey Gavna, good morning, go ahead.</p><p> - We have uh, a smoke problem, and we are doing emergency descend to speed level 25... err 240?</p><p> - Confirm you wish to descend to speed level two four zero (0.5 light years per second)?</p><p> - Yeah, we've already commenced due to a smoke problem in the spaceplane.</p><p>In between themselves, the crew are talking in their native Selkupnam language.</p><p>- Ytaina, kan jy... vir ons... (Can you for us?)</p><p>- Wit? (What?)</p><p>- Kan jy ladyyn zarlig sӛӛkvolmonooxid vir ons khijrla? (Can you do the carbon monoxide checklist for us please?)</p><p>- Ja.</p><p>- Und euaiovol әnploesbleck zarligijn sons activyyn.(And activate supplemental oxygen per checklist).</p><p>- Do you, uhh... request a full emergency?</p><p> - Affirmative, that's Itte Jitte. (Itte Jitte is an intergalactic code for an emergency where captain can't be sure what's next, as opposed to Charlie Charlie where there is a certain course).</p><p>However, there is a more urgent problem aboard the flight - passengers are having trouble breathing. Whatever is burning in the cargo area, produces thick smoke that can be hazardous to the passengers even before the spaceplane can reach safety.</p><p>Flight attendants move people to the forward section of the spaceplane. Andre uses up fire extinguishers bottle by bottle, although the fire seems to be never ending. Meanwhile everyone is rushing either to put out the fire, or away from it, Captain Ӛys maintains his calm composture and requests an emergency landing as if he orders a pizza.</p><p> - Sassy 2020, Papey Gavna.</p><p> - Eh, go ahead.</p><p> - Request your DME distance and actual position.</p><p> - We haven't got the DME yet.</p><p>A k-pop idol and fan gathering has formed near the seat of Cherri. They are also putting on their masks and stuffing them with whatever material possible to avoid the smoke.</p><p> - I will text the group leaders, Anna and Smolen-Luna.</p><p> - It is 4 am, what the hell? - asks Felix.</p><p> "We are on board this plane which has fire on board and huge smoke and we are not sure if we are going to make it."</p><p> - Don't worry, we're gonna go to the morning sea when this is all done. </p><p>The k-pop gathering is holding on to their seats and to each other. One of the YB members, Mariel, is awake at 4 AM, when she suddenly receives a message about the plane's situation from dancer Yehye.</p><p>In PG, the controller asks:</p><p> - Roger, and your actual position please?</p><p> - What?</p><p> - Actual position.</p><p>Dawie looks to the coordinate system panel, only to see it is dead. Xe says:</p><p> - Uhh, I have lost a lot of electrics, we haven't got anything on the spacecraft.</p><p>The crew follows another checklist to get rid of the smoke.</p><p>- Supplementary fan switch... off. Recirculating fan switches, - ... - on.</p><p> - I declare a full emergency. Sassy 2020, do you have Echo Tango A-star Papey Gavna please? (ETA - estimated time of arrival).</p><p> - Sassy 2020, Papey Gavna.</p><p> - Ja, Papey Gavna?</p><p>The smoke in the cabin is getting thicker, and some of the people from a small planet species are starting their prayers and are setting up weird rituals. Flight attendants try hardest to calm them down. </p><p> - Do you have Echo Tango A-star Papey Gavna please?</p><p> - I would guess... let me think... zero four... three zero. Plus minus zero zero one zero.</p><p> - Roger, 04:30 +- 00:10. Thank you.</p><p> - Smoke condition... let's check downstairs. </p><p>Captain Stefan gets out of the cargo hold after intensive usage of bottles, and he calls Dawie Ӛys:</p><p>- It's worse. We can't breathe down here!</p><p>With the spaceplane having achieved speed level 240, the crew are going to perform a very risky maneuver, that few pilots of large spaceliners have ever performed: opening the doors mid-flight. The risk is that once the gas leaves the warp drive protection, it creates a large level of radiation and a stellar shockwave. </p><p> - We need to open the doors. Repeat, open the doors! - Ӛys gives a briefing to the cabin. Opening the doors in mid-space is the only thing that can possibly now clear the smoke from the cabin.</p><p> - Hey Ytaina, shut down the oxygen left... - this transmission accidentally goes to traffic control</p><p> - ...and turn on the depressurization supplemental oxygen. Let's see. Given that we have pressure of 1 MPa, slight crack by 10 degrees should give us airflow of 540k m^3, repeat not 540 km^3, per second. </p><p> - Attention passengers, this is Captain Ӛys speaking, we are opening two of the entry doors to clear the smoke from the cabin. Do not panic, you will be more comfortable once we complete this procedure.</p><p>Vilccéinskéij gets to the entry door and makes a small crack by turning the handle from 0 to 10 degrees. Woooooooooooosh. The air begins rushing out of the spaceship, while the supplementary oxygen generator works to keep the pressure inside normal. All small papers, things, some socks, began to fly dramatically in the air. People from YB, and everyone on board is trying to enjoy fresh air. The human-like species has entered new rituals while seated after opening the doors.</p><p> - Ladies and gentlemen and traffic control, we've opened the doors to see if we can... we should be okay.</p><p>Just as they think they are cleaning up the smoke, Ӛys gets interrupted by someone over the last part of his sentence:</p><p> - Right there! Close the bloody door! - screams Shinear.</p><p> - Ytaina, switch up quickly, then close the hole on your side. - Dawie adds to fix the mounting problems.</p><p>Smoke is now building in the cockpit, but there is no outside door to open.</p><p> - Pressure, uh, twelve thousand. - says Asen. Nobody knows what he is referring to.</p><p> - What?</p><p> - Genoeg is... Eders vlug kan mit im zovlongschap... (Enough, else our flight might end in disaster).</p><p>Tamata decides ot use the bathroom mid-disaster. The rest of YB wishes her to be safe. Yehye tells Mariel that they have opened the doors, smoke appears to be clearing from the cabin, but Cherri and Kaleria, another dancer, show no sign of life. </p><p> - Papey Gavna, we're 65 light years.</p><p> - Eh Papey Gavna, Sassy 2020, did you copy?</p><p> - Uh, negative, 2020, say again, please say aagain.</p><p> - We're 65 light years.</p><p> - Confirm 65 light years.</p><p>The traffic controller incorrectly understood to mean that spaceplane was 65 light-years from the star, when in reality it was 65 light-years from the waypoint Agipig and 145 light-years from the star.</p><p> - Ja, affirmative Itte Jitte.</p><p>The mashup artist has posted zir year end and it is now loaded. Ze show no signs of disaster to social media, since ze believe that zir social life has to be perfect. </p><p> - Eh, Roger, Sassy 2020, you are cleared to speed level niner zero, cleared niner zero. - says STC.</p><p> - Roger, niner zero.</p><p>Amongst the exchange team with eizrex mavkae, there are also signs of abscence of life. Many of passengers are texting their loved ones because they have recognized severity of the situation.</p><p>- If it would make anyone feel better, we can listen to live ATC? - suggests Augustine May.</p><p>- Alright, answers Gaspir Anris. </p><p> - "It seems like we are already going to have smoked Amnit before we arrive" - says Luschik.</p><p> - What lol, ... no. - replies Amnit.</p><p> - And, important, ... Sassy 2020 Papey Gavna copy actual weather Papey Gavna slash Serendip. The wind is 110 degrees at 6 km/h, visibility above 1000 km, and we have a slight precipitation niner niner zero in sight to the north. </p><p> - Oh boy... says Gaspir. </p><p>Clouds, six niner percent ground level, 1 Earth one five percent. Temperature is 12192, Mike is four decimal six, RTMG is 1.034 Earths, pressure is 137 kPa, that is Neper 203.46</p><p> - Two zero three four six roger, </p><p> - and gravity is one point two two cgs, one point two two over.</p><p> - Roger, one point two two.</p><p> - Affirmative, eh, and both runways are available if you wish.</p><p>"Oh, we are getting a runway assigned". - Amnit say with worry as they hold onto Augustine. </p><p> - And 2020, request pilot's intention.</p><p> - We'd like to track in on one three.</p><p> - Confirm runway one four. (there is no Runway 13 at Papey Gavna Spaceport)</p><p> - Itte Jitte.</p><p> - Affirmative, you are cleared direct to Ixitte Igrekjitte (a beacon at one of the planets orbiting the star).</p><p> - Kay.</p><p>Mariel receives a message that goes: "I can't now be using our phones [sic] in an emergency, I will say when this is done". The Helderberg continues on its desperate journey.</p><p>The controller grabs some tea as he has cleared the traffic fully. This is the first emergency the spaceport has handled in hundreds of thousands of years. Space traffic controller looks at the screen, waiting for flight to appear. But at 04:08, the call by him is not returned.</p><p> - 2020, Papey Gavna.</p><p>Uh...</p><p> - Sassy 2020, Papey Gavna.</p><p> - Sassy 2020, Papey Gavna!</p><p>Nothing.</p><p>-------------------------------------------------------------------<br/>
With no response form Flight 2020 beyond arrival time of 04:30, Papey Gavna space traffic control formally declares an emergency. An alert goes out to search and rescue crews.<br/>
- Papey Gavna spaceport request search and rescue Sassy 2020, 65 light years in the direction 12 -45.</p><p> The traffic controller Amnute Atbaiae files a paper report, which is accompanying to the official declaration of emergency. In addition, at South Pole Spaceport flight is listed as "cancelled". Spaceline begins notifying families that the plane has gone missing, first with a text message, because the flight was scheduled to arrive at 08:11. Mariel checks up on TheFlightRadar to see if the flight is okay, but it says "Estimated to Papey Gavna".</p><p>Several UFOs take off from Papey Gavna in search of the missing plane. They are operated by Papey Gavna Search and Rescue Corps (PGSRC). One of the operators, Sabute Aneitaoe, says:<br/>
- For families, 4:30 AM is not a convenient time to know that a plane has crashed. Especially given that the intended arrival time was 08:11. I think about it.<br/>
- Ooh, understandable. I am going to give a briefing of what star we are searching. - replies Barheut Srutsesewe.<br/>
- They said 65 light-years, 12/-45, the closest star to that position is Engel Whlegs, or number 15688 in the Ipipipip catalogue. Let's see. - adds Sabute.</p><p>After searching the dark space for several hours, they arrive at a star 15688, and decide to check planets from external to internal. At about 8 AM, when families already gathered to learn about the missing flight, the rescue corps descends upon the planet e.<br/>
- Spectral type G3, radius point niner sun, luminosity 0.788, and it has 4 planets. Let's descend on the star and check the most distant planet e. - says Barheut.<br/>
- I will check the Bromberg app to make an instantaneous calendar if it has solid surface or fixed rotation. And it has... oceans of propane and atmosphere of neon. Not bad, at least we can exercise true solar time. - this time says Kareosfeoi Tinus, another search and rescue worker.<br/>
- The ocean density near the surface is 648, gravity is 12.816, this gives us a pressure gradient of 8279 Pa/m. Atmospheric pressure is 110 kPa.<br/>
- However, by a stroke of luck, because density gets larger, the true ocean depth on this planet is 100'000 meters exactly, that is +- 1 meter.<br/>
- Given that the spacecraft has a mass of 10^15, we would notice it by simply having a gravitational anomaly.</p><p>As the PGSRC flying saucers descend on the planet, they are witnessing a still, deep blue color.<br/>
- Establish altitude of 10'000 m and request RTMG.<br/>
- RTMG is 5584 meters.<br/>
Kareosfeoi calibrates his camera to a scale height of 5584 meters, which is a distance by which atmospheric pressure decreases e times. This is neccessary to account for light being distorted by the gas, in the field of small object imagery.<br/>
- Look there!<br/>
- What?<br/>
- I have found some floating spacecraft debris.<br/>
- There it goes. Zoom in.<br/>
The workers from PGSRC have found wrist watches floating on the surface. There were 2 watches which were showing Universal Time, and 2 watches from the original planet. One of them was a calendar-watch, which showed the date and time of original planet's calendar. In addition, the imagery shows a k-pop magazine, a tennis racket, and some writings in original planet's languages floating on the surface of propane.<br/>
- Descend upon 1°37'34"S, 41°29'55" E.<br/>
- Roger.<br/>
As the crew descended upon the place, they have also found what appears to be oil slicks. The rescue workers show the images to the spaceline. The rescue crew bring 4 of these watches to the UFO. One is still running and showing the real time - 08:11, other has stopped at 04:13, both calendar watches have stopped at a reading: 1933-03-12, 15:1343:55. The crew deduced the time of impact with the planet to be 04:13 AM.</p><p> - Hold on, why is the warp fuel slick so small, if the spacecraft is 70 km long? We would see a big area, not a small one.<br/>
- Yes, right. We are only seeing something few hundred meters across.<br/>
- We need to make a visualization of gravitational anomaly. Request climb to 1000 km.<br/>
- That is approved as requested.</p><p>The flying saucer takes gravitational map of the celestial objects, and finds nothing that can be descended upon. The planet still shows a smooth 100 km ocean of propane, as if nothing was there. </p><p>While the UFO was at 1'000 km above the planet's surface, they discovered more pieces of wreckage in elliptical orbits of random eccentricity. In addition, they also found the more grim content - bodies showing extreme trauma.<br/>
- It seems like this planet is not what we are looking for.<br/>
--------------------------------<br/>
Rennie van Zӛl (pronounced like "sail"), the head of astrophysics department of South African Safety Committee, is assigned to the case. Also the pronunciation of the language can be tricky. In addition, Stellar Transportation Safety Board has assigned Dave Consiglio, the head of eschatic event department, and Edward Reese, the head of ecology department, since the spacecraft was carrying the planet's entire biosphere.</p><p>By 14:00, the PGSRC has made a search of 3 planetary systems next to the position, and they found a total of 1800 kg of debris, and 8 dead bodies. This is when the information has fully reached families, and it became apparent that the spacecraft was lost.</p><p> - For now, let's do with what we have. - says Rennie.<br/>
- Let's take a look at what we have from the plane.<br/>
In the 1800 kg of retrieved debris, the crew has found phones, computers, tennis rackets, pants for 40 hryvnas, astronomical equipment, and the biological death - members of species and destroyed plants.<br/>
- Eddie, I have a question. Do plants have feelings? - asks Ren.<br/>
- The answer is no. Plants do not have a central nervous system, nor they have means for feeling pain.<br/>
- This means we can examine plants for how bad the fire was. Bodies can rest for now, for ethical reasons. - says Ren. - And I also have another idea. How about we bring all of the wreckage to the US, because now the southern countries are in a very sensitive political regimen.<br/>
- That would be good.<br/>
-----<br/>
The next day, 10'000 kg of wreckage in total has been found. The investigation is located in Thathangka Iyotake Laboratory in Lakota City.</p><p> - This is the first fire in the 100 million-year history of 747 Cham son of Noach. And in general a fire on a wide body spacecraft. - says Dave.<br/>
- Let's start the testing. - says John Eelers, a chemist.<br/>
The investigative group puts some pieces of carbon lifeform to a high-resolution atomic microscope that can see atoms. In addition, chemical and nuclear tests are conducted, as it is not possible to determine what atom it is, by radius alone. </p><p> - Look at this... Look at the damage. - quietly says Myere Power.<br/>
- This looks like textbook molecular dissociation, but also looks like someone karate chopped the DNA molecules. - says Eelers.<br/>
Molecular dissociation is when the temperature becomes hot enough to separate molecules into atoms.<br/>
- Even with the fixing for stellar temperatures of 100'000 Kelvin, the cargo still shows signs of fire.<br/>
- How hot was this thing? 5 million? - asks Myere.<br/>
Just as Myere asked his question, he gets an answer from Stellara Al-Ayn. She is a Muslim lesbian who likes cheesy romantic movies, but she can also be solid, like right now.<br/>
- Look at this. A more solid piece of evidence. - Burnt gamma-ray machine. The material from which the casing is made, is rodonite. It can withstand temperatures of up to 1 billion kelvin, yet here it shows signs of damage. Here it was pushed to the limit.</p><p> - How these machines work? - asks Rennie.<br/>
- Actually, material itself begins to give way starting at 260 million K, but the machine's operating structure is designed to accomodate this up to 400-500 million K. - Stellara describes.<br/>
- It seems as if materials show contradicting fire temperatures - says Eddie. - These temperatures, when applied to plants, would actually leave atoms in pieces, not just molecules.<br/>
- Now this sounds like a terrorist bomb. - says Rennie.</p><p>In South Africa, the news that investigation has entered a standstill, has reached the main public. The spacecraft has officially been declared missing. The people are obsessed with the cause of the crash, and it won't be long before conspiracy theories will appear on forums.<br/>
A hypothesis that there was a bomb in the cargo, is now on the official table of consideration. </p><p> - What is particularly pushing the bomb hypothesis forward, is that South African Airways offices around the universe have been the subject of far right attacks. For example in '8985, an office in HR-2020 was attacked due to "perceived effeminacy". - Bijldan van Ryneveld gives information.<br/>
- Oh, far right. As born on an Earth-like planet I am familiar with this excessively, because our fight for LGBT rights was essentially... a war with essentialists. There. - explains Eddie.<br/>
- With the bits of cargo and metal we have, we can examine if these have spatter cavities. - says Dave.<br/>
- We can also examine the bodies? - asks Stellara.<br/>
- Yeah we potentially could, but police would like to be present, and you know how much police loves to collaborate with right radicals. - explains Neutron Swift, another investigator.  - Also, the Incel Intifada is beginning to sprout. </p><p> - The what?- asks Skwleltkwe Shmueli (סקולאלתקוה שמואלי), an intergalactic investigator and anti-terrorism expert from Israel. The look on their face was as if they have been exposed to the investigation for the first time. "I am familiar with terrorism, but this is something new. What are the words these people come up with?" - they ask.<br/>
- People feel like society owes them sex, sex is a person right lalala, and their response is "thuh joowz". So they decide to bomb things. - says Swift.<br/>
- Oh, this makes a lot of sense within current anti-terrorist theory. - says Skwleltkwe.<br/>
- Anyway... well we are major investigators now, not people in a safe space scared of accidentally our coordinates. I think we should get the authority to check the more "serious" cargo including bodies. - Reese asks.  - Also the hell? only medical or necrological team should be present.<br/>
- Okay, let's first examine the cargo.<br/>
The investigative team put the pieces of cargo to the similar test to as before, and in addition the necrological sector gets access to 1 body.<br/>
- This is the pile of computers that was carried, and it shows no sign of sputter cavities. - says Bijldan.<br/>
Sputter cavities are caused when activated pieces of explosive material strike the non-explosive material at high speed, similar to how a star vaporizes a comet or a hot Jupiter.<br/>
- Neither show the personal belognings. - says Stellara.<br/>
- We have one more think to check. - The bodies. - says Neutron.</p><p>In the office, morgue workers are examining the body of a 22 year old girl from a small planet, and two animals. They make an X-ray of joints and see no evidence of flail injuries, that is if a person were thrown out of the spacecraft before it crashed. The evidence strongly suggests - no bomb. Instead, the injuries look like typical atmospheric entry at high speed. In addition, after listening to an STC tape, the investigative team has determined that crew appear to be coping with an emergency.</p><p>Next day, after examining all the cargo and bodies, investigators present their first finding.</p><p> - Rennie, the bomb has been ruled out. - says Skwleltkwe. - No spatter cavities, no flail injuries.<br/>
- Looks good. So what can be our next lead? - he asks.<br/>
- The next lead - check the passenger and cargo manifest. - Dave imposes.</p><p>With physical evidence reaching a standstill, the team turns to the manifest - what the plane was carrying. </p><p>-	Here is our manifest. – says Dave<br/>
-	So we have the entire populace of that planet inside the spacecraft. In addition a large number of sample specimen of 9’300’000 species, up to 20 each. And an array of people from 13’418 stars. – Skwleltkwe reads out.<br/>
-	Apparently that’s it? Only animals? – asks the eschatic investigator.<br/>
-	Yes, only animals. – Skwleltkwe says.<br/>
-	Perhaps a wiring problem in the plane had started the fire. The only way to know is to salvage the wreckage. But we don’t even know where the wreckage is. – Rennie replies.<br/>
-	We will have to turn to the salvage company I know, because I am sure that a star the size of Papey Gavna won’t help us. – Dave proposes a solution.<br/>
-	And? Skwleltkwe says.<br/>
-	The salvage company is kxcd underwaters, and it has massive amounts of technology to recover the crashed pieces also. – Dave answers, - In addition we have to establish a team of people that would check every passenger’s life stories and backgrounds.<br/>
-	Well this sounds good. Sabotage may take subtle forms, and not just the conventional bombs.<br/>
Rennie turns to the United States for help and travels to KXCD Underwaters headquarters in Samscore, which is located in the state of Yamwe at 53°14'33" S 138°29'59" E.<br/>
-	Rennie van Zӛl, head of South African Transport Safety Agency. We would like to search for the crash site of the Helderberg Penisforce 747-188 spacecraft.<br/>
-	And what kind of equipment do you want?<br/>
-	Our investigation requires spacecraft to locate the crashed debris, and then to salvage them from whatever depth possible. The primary search discovered no debris on planetary or stellar land.<br/>
-	Understood, if you are looking for commercial spacecraft wreckage, it will take 21 days for proper equipment to be assembled on the ocean.<br/>
-	Okay, I will get the investigation informed to not rely on the flight recorder pingers.<br/>
-	Pingers?<br/>
-	Pingers are location instruments which allow the recorder to be found. These operate at a frequency of 42.1-32.8i khz, and they last for 30 days. This means that if we even start now we will have about a week left of useful time. But I would like to start the search and assembly process anyway.<br/>
-	Okay, we will keep you informed.<br/>
Ren shares his findings with the rest of the team. Stellara asks:<br/>
-	So, this means at most a week of time left to search?<br/>
-	Yes. – Ren says. But I already launched the procedure of equipment assembly.<br/>
-	Okay. For now let’s wait for passenger manifest to be processed. </p><p>To seek through passenger manifest, 67’600’000 people were selected with experience in forensics, police, and understanding of human behavior. 676 is 26 squared, which stands for every name and surname on the manifest running from A to Z. This means a single person has to check about 113 people, the workload which can be done in about the time needed to recover the underwater debris.</p><p>As the KXCD company uses gravitational anomaly scanning of planets and stars to find the wreckage, the workers of the morgue section perform the blood tests on the bodies recovered. One worker places the dark red, almost black blood into a chemical setup. Then the readings begin.<br/>
-	12 mmol/l of zondium (9891) perchlorate? This is insane. – says chemist Rihanna. – Not mentioning the out of range carbon monoxide levels of 66%.<br/>
-	66% levels of what? – asks Corin.<br/>
-	Carboxyhemoglobin. – Sewetse, another chemist corrects Rihanna.<br/>
-	Well shit. – Corin says.<br/>
-	Also there is a high level of soot (that is literal carbon) in trachea. This is an indicative that some of the passengers were already dead before the plane crashed.  – Zozibini says.<br/>
-	Also there is a high level of gomomium (4374) –XII polonate. Imma be honest, this is the first time I have ever seen anything like this. I’d be more accepting of red mercury or some shit at this point. – says Rihanna.<br/>
-	Also there is a high level of “Also there is a high level”. – Zozibini shuts everyone out. </p><p>Meanwhile the KXCD underwaters assembles operations to find the plane, Rennie van Zӛl decided to launch a separate investigation into the cause of the fire. He goes to the Penisforce laboratory to find out how 747 Cham, son of Noach was tested for fire safety certification.<br/>
-	How the spacecraft was tested?<br/>
-	Come here with us, we will show you.<br/>
Rennie and the Penisforce team enter the demonstration spacecraft, N-()()()(). It is a Penisforce 747-208, the upcoming version.<br/>
-	So the testing is conducted by setting a 0.5 km^3 bale of automobile tires and kakawala leaves on fire using a combined explosive of FireTNT and TNTFirework. – says Berry, a technician.<br/>
-	Alright. Demonstrate me.<br/>
The testing team as put an explosive inside a bale of leaves, and a muffled sound came about. Then, the smoke started coming out of the leaves and the bale went hot.<br/>
-	Here is me with an extinguisher entering the cargo hold. – says Tesekl, another technician. – Here is the extinguisher material, as you can see it spreads for kilometers.<br/>
-	Alright.<br/>
-	Now the cube is gamma hot, but it is already losing power.<br/>
-	I see.<br/>
-	There it is , collapsing. And the fire is extinguished. Now let’s go to the passenger cabin.<br/>
The SA and American teams went to the passenger cabin.<br/>
-	As you can see, the gas level is no greater than 0.08%, or 300 millitrends.<br/>
-	Alright, when we will wait for salvaging the wreckage we will see if this confirms conditions on the Helderberg.<br/>
Rennie returns to South Africa and asks the forensic team about the results. And they have turned up an alarming lead.<br/>
-	I have found something here, - says investigator Batzorig de Klerk. And it is quite unsettling.<br/>
-	Show it please.<br/>
-	It begins with this image. </p><p>However, Ren can’t quite believe what he is seeing, and he asks:<br/>
-	This is image of a man digging in a toilet dumpsite with condoms full of shit. Are you sure this is relevant to the crash?<br/>
Batzorig brings up more detailing evidence.<br/>
-	One piece of the pants that was in the recovered debris shares the same electromagnetic radiation input. Meaning it looks the same, and across all wavelengths. And I have some social media posts that are just as unsettling.<br/>
-	Okay, show them to me. – says Rennie.<br/>
-	This is a piece of news by CovidPride, an LGBT + O(T) pride journal from the planet Covid, which is 2.5 billion light-years away.<br/>
-	Okay, okay. And?<br/>
-	Here there is an article about how far-right activists were planning to carry  to attack the pride parade, and how they dug up 200 charges of shit in condom to throw at people. And I am going to tell you that this shit is incredibly flammable. I have tracked down social media of this passenger, 92% confidence, and found 3 other names on the manifest who could have tried to smuggle shit, although less than 30% confidence.<br/>
-	What the hell. I don’t quite believe this.<br/>
Van Zӛl looks at the report in silent disbelief. He has never seen anything like this in his career.<br/>
-	Me neither but here is the 14-page report that rules out other possibilities.<br/>
-	I have a trailing question. – Rennie asks. – How much shit do you think would bring down a jumbo warp? And can it catch fire by itself?<br/>
-	This is to be answered when the wreckage is found. – Batzorig tries to reassure.<br/>
-	My another trailing question, is that it is the end of November that we are talking about. There are no major Pride-related events at the end of November, or beginning of December. </p><p>De Klerk adds more words to his reassurement. </p><p>-	92% confidence is only 175 gifts, so this requires further investigation.<br/>
The lead investigator is unsettled by the new finding that excrements could have brought down South African Airways Flight 2020. At first, he doesn’t know how to break the news to the whole investigative team, and a confidence interval is 3% below of him making a good-intentioned disclosure. He asks Eddie for help.<br/>
-	Eddie, I have a finding which suggests right-wing shit may have brought down the plane.<br/>
-	Tell me more?<br/>
-	Here is a report by Batzorig de Klerk, which shows the evidence, and it settles at a 92% confidence interval. It is still short of reliability by about a hundred gifts, but it is very non-trivial.<br/>
Eddie takes some time to read the report. Then he says, with a stark look at the lead investigator.<br/>
-	Condoms full of shit. When I was 33, our planet was in a similar situation. Two hundred,… even the number matches, wow. Except that it would definitely take more than 200 condoms to take down a plane.<br/>
-	Should we present this finding? – asks Rennie.<br/>
-	Well I think it would be good.<br/>
Ren then thinks for a second.<br/>
-	Unfortunately, I think that news stories are really going to spin it. People might round 92% confidence to 100% pretty easily, with no understanding of how sigma intervals work.<br/>
-	I think we should go for it. News are always news. – says Eddie.<br/>
-	Alright, should this mean a hearing?<br/>
-	Yes. </p><p>Batzorig presents her findings.<br/>
-	Warning. I do not recommend listening to my presentation while eating. Has the warning been heard?<br/>
A quick silence descends on the conference room.<br/>
-	Okay, here we go. After sifting through an assigned piece of passenger manifest, we have discovered a potential  for 3 people who were attempting to smuggle fecal matter in condoms through the main cargo hold, and we have a piece of visual evidence with 92% confidence interval.<br/>
Batzorig shows the picture of a man digging in the ground, and whole room starts laughing. Skylaar Wessel explains the conforming evidence.<br/>
-	This is the electromagnetic print of the image, and this is the electromagnetic print that we discovered from the pants found in the floating spacecraft debris. We have established a 98.1% similarity, and a 92% confidence interval, 175 gifts, between the two.<br/>
-	In addition, we could not find the event that could be subjected to being thrown with shit. – says Batzorig.<br/>
Afterwards, they presented the whole report.<br/>
The news media quickly took this into a firestorm. The 92% interval was misunderstood by the general public, as Rennie suspected. Der Afrikaner Gen, (The Afrikaner Way) and many other newspapers, wrote that there is a 92% chance the shit was smuggled onboard, but really this measurement just belongs to one piece of evidence.<br/>
A lesbian and intersectional activist Ntokozo gives the investigative team another piece of evidence.<br/>
-	This is something that you might be interested in. – she says.<br/>
-	Okay, show it to us. – says Eddie.<br/>
-	On November 24, 4 days before the crash, there was an attack by biologist activists at people in the street after attending a pride event called “Ours in the U.S”.<br/>
-	Okay, it seems that there may be a connection between the two. Thank you for your addition.<br/>
Ntokozo makes one more adding.<br/>
-	In addition, in July 8983, right-wing extremists, (or should I say “excremists”? Haha…) from the star HR-2020 attacked an SAA office in Tel Aviv. The motive of the attack was that the SAA office was the property of some HR-2020-ian oligarchs.<br/>
-	Okay. This is useful information.<br/>
At this point the investigation reaches a standstill, while the underwater salvage company is searching for Helderberg’s wreckage.<br/>
----------------------------</p><p>January 25, 8988, HIP 828056.<br/>
61 days after the Helderberg has gone missing, van Zӛl receives some news from KXCD Underwaters. A gravitational imaging satellite has found a mass anomaly inside an unnamed planet catalogued as 16510 Ipipipip g. </p><p>The researcher Snow-on-her shows the upper investigation, Rennie, Edward, and Dave an image with gray and black dots with an acceleration map, and then xe says:<br/>
My people, that’s your wreckage.<br/>
Ren stares at the imagery and says:<br/>
How do you know it is the Helderberg? It could be an ancient sunken city or some shit.<br/>
Then Snow-on-Her says:<br/>
Rennie, it is, because we tell you it is. We have spent a lot of time searching.<br/>
3 lead investigators think, and eventually Rennie says:<br/>
Then it is time to launch the most expensive part of the investigation. Operation Resolve.<br/>
The planet they are looking is a mercury giant with a radius of 67230.498 km, or 10.541 Earth. </p><p>Dave looks at planet parameters and says:<br/>
I wonder if Helderberg crashed at 99.9999999% the speed of light, hehe. Would make for a good Everyone Dies scenario, except it looks like Nobody Exists.<br/>
Alright. – says Snow-on-Her.<br/>
Snow-on-Her asks people: Do you want to undertake an automated vehicle to the bottom, or do you want to launch a manned submarine?<br/>
Dave says: We would like to launch a manned submarine to have a first look.<br/>
I have two news, one neutral and one bad. Which one to start with?<br/>
Neutral. – says Dave.<br/>
The neutral piece of news is that inner core has a radius of 11304.710 km,  gravity at the surface is 198.12 m/s2 or 4.297 cgs, pressure is 116.98 TPa, density at the transition layer is 34’631 kg/m3, and the gravity is the same as at the surface. Gravity and pressure follow a linear law all the way, while density follows… this curve. I don’t know how to name it.</p><p>Dave says:<br/>
Okay, we can salvage the curve from standard formula. g small is GM over r^2. To calculate given layer density, we need to find the total mass inside that layer and take a derivative, because gravity inside a sphere cancels out. Then we get the derivative of 1/3, -2/3. So we can clearly see all that goes between 10’541 and 34’631. That was good news?</p><p>Snow-on-Her continues:<br/>
Yes. This was good news. However, the submarine must be connected to a mother vessel via an elevator shaft cable. We are going to a depth of 56’015’788 meters, and no cable that long has ever been built. Not even on hypergiant stars. It would take some more time to build a 60000 km cable. Insane.<br/>
Insane is an ableist word, - Eddie corrects the researcher.<br/>
Okay, I will know.</p><p>Meanwhile the processes are happening, the investigative team goes once again to Penisforce testing facility to replicate conditions on the Helderberg. They now use a pallet of computers, plastic, wood, cardboard, animal corpses, and add a pile of condoms to check the theory.<br/>
Set it off.<br/>
Done.</p><p>The fire starts from a small flame, into an orange, yellow, white, and then blue-violet fire. Then UV, X-ray and gamma-colors start showing from the fire.  Various pieces of material start shooting droplets, like a misused oil pan. And this time, smoke enters the cabin. </p><p>Dave Consiglio then gives an interview about why the design of the Cham, son of Noach itself may have doomed the flight.</p><p>	747 Cham, son of Noach was tested for fire prevention by setting a bale of kakawala leaves and automobile tires on fire. Well that was in the test condition, millions of years ago. Unfortunately, as we saw in flight 2020, it didn’t work that way, because you didn’t have a nice clean fire. In general, the words “nice, clean” and “fire” don’t really belong next to each other. What you had instead is fire that spread faster than smoke regenerated, and you had plastic and cardboard sheeting that while was meant to provide animals with service, also was providing fuel to the fire, in addition to the species members themselves who couldn’t escape. </p><p>Interviewer then asks:<br/>
But wasn’t the air kept at a higher pressure in the passenger cabin to prevent the smoke from entering?<br/>
Dave responds:<br/>
Unfortunately, in reality it doesn’t work that way. Once air inside the Noah’s ark area gets hot enough, the formula pV = nRT becomes tilted to the other side, and now hotter air with more pressure flows into the passenger compartment.<br/>
After the second test, Eddie says:<br/>
We are also having a suspicion of one standard deviation that there are problems with the checklist, which had a bigger lethality. As the passenger cabin filled with smoke, the checklist instructed the crew to turn on cabin’s recirculating fans. The intention of the checklist is to dissipate the smoke after the fire has been extinguished, but our findings guide us towards that this is not what happened in this case.<br/>
Interviewer then asks: “What you then think happened?”.<br/>
In this case, turning the fans on may have been deadly. These fans, - Eddie makes a pause, – draw air from above the cabin’s ceiling and cargo ceiling before recirculating it back to the passengers. In fact, we have found from the existing floating wreckage a body which had a carboxyhemoglobin level of 99.93%, or 5.15 rating on the logistic distribution. That is, the blood was not just intoxicated with gas, but was, - *pause*, - consisting of it instead of oxygen.<br/>
No checklist for 747 Cham, son of Noach has ever foreseen two simultaneous problems – species fire problem and a cabin smoke problem. Investigators come to a conclusion that fighting a fire in Cham’s species area is more difficult than previously thought.<br/>
---<br/>
On August 32, 8988, the underwater ship with thick walls and the cable have finally been built. The investigation moves to a planet where the plane crashed, the fact which is now known for certain.<br/>
A special UFO is constructed to carry the ship, with registration N-Ӹ↑Ⲉ♭ↈƜS2, which is then dispatched to a planet. Eddie then asks:<br/>
Hold on, we need a surface condition.<br/>
Snow-on-Her checks and gives info:</p><p>	Temperature 1789 K, pressure 210.1 MPa, air made of lithium, scale height 10’816 m if anyone cares.<br/>
Everyone get lithium breathing masks. – says Rennie.<br/>
Then, the bottom door of the UFO opens, and the crew see the stormy waves of supercritical mercury.<br/>
I’ve never seen so much of supercritical mercury. – excites Rennie. – In fact, I have never seen so much of supercritical any substance.<br/>
You’ve seen supercritical air in stars, don’t @ me. – Skwleltkwe says.</p><p>The crew is inside a small ship which is on top of a big ship which is inside a flying saucer. The mothership is launched into mercury, then Skwleltkwe gets out and breaks a bottle of champagne over the bow. Everyone yells, “Operation Resolve!!!” </p><p>	You thought I wouldn’t have this in my pocket? – Israeli investigator says with squirm and smile.<br/>
Afterwards, the submarine is lowered, and 60’000 km cable begins unrolling. The flying saucer flies above a planet and into an orbit. The spaceship begins acceleration to a speed of 8192 km/h, or 5062 mph.<br/>
The sub ship depth increases, first 100 km, then 200, then 300. The pressure gauge went above 600 GPa. Snow-on-Her says, “You know, this water has bigger GPA than I ever had”.</p><p>At this depth, it is a dull, reddish-orange color, that eventually transferred to a buttery, golden yellow.<br/>
Wait a second. – says Skwleltkwe. – This color isn’t really found at high temperatures. This is weird.<br/>
Yes, we started drifting away from Planckian locus. – says Stellara.<br/>
1000 km. 1500 km. 2000 km. 2500 km.</p><p>At 2500 km, density increases only to 10585, because curve has a small growth.<br/>
Raise the speed to 12288. says Stellara.<br/>
Alright.<br/>
3000 km. 4000 km. 5000 km. The ocean has now reached a creamy pink color inside the planet. Alongside the pressure readings, the sub also records color distribution inside.<br/>
Eventually the sub reaches the final depth of 56’015’788 meters, and it descends upon a flat plateau. Afterwards, the crew start searching.<br/>
Our desired coordinates are 19 S, 61 E ±3 degrees. This is where the gravitational anomaly is. – says Snow-on-Her.<br/>
Okay, you said that’s our wreckage so let’s go. – Rennie responds.<br/>
At first, they see nothing on the ocean floor, but eventually start seeing pieces of luggage and metal strewn over a wide area.<br/>
The relative error of 3 degrees on this core means 592 km, which means we should find 68% of the wreckage here.<br/>
And finally, late in the day on September 1, the crew are finally seeing images of what only could be the Helderberg.<br/>
You know what, I would like to find the piece of plate with registration, ∑▒〖〖(-1)〗^(i+j) a_i^j 〗 M_i^j. – says Rennie. - Also does anyone have any idea why we are on this planet?<br/>
Search specialist Jerry Corin says:<br/>
When the captain reported that he was “65 light-years”, he was actually 65 light-years from the waypoint Agapip, and 145 light-years from the star. After reviewing the STC tape, we went over here and found quickly the wreckage.<br/>
Oh, what a twist. – Rennie says.<br/>
The underwater vessel moves forward slightly, and then sees bigger pieces. Finally, the wreckage of South African Airways Flight 2020 has been found. Everyone started clapping. The investigative team are seeing pieces of Penisforce 747 strewn over an area of 350’000 square kilometers. Hydraulics, pipes, wing ribs and spars, spacecraft skin, luggage, and the most unsettling wreckage of all – the bodies. </p><p>	Now it is time to get the necrological team to retreive the bodies. – Eddie says.<br/>
The main crew gets to the surface and flies back to the US, and investigation is handled over to the necrologists. The necrological team is led by Shilen Tanri.<br/>
Okay, get the pressure gear on, and exit the ship.<br/>
The team has put their spacesuit-like gear on and has exited to the ocean floor.<br/>
You know, I am going to think of a really creative way to raise the bodies to the surface. – says Annӛkӛ, another necrologist.<br/>
Okay?<br/>
First we depressurise the vessel, then we put wreckage in and pressurise it. Mercury pressure will automatically lift them to the surface.<br/>
Sounds like a plan.</p><p>Submarine is modified for this procedure, and the retrieval of small substance from the crash site begins normally. Larger pieces are retrieved manually using the UFO. But on September 15th, they encounter something weird. At the bottom of the ocean, they suddenly see two figures. One is a tall, masculine in red attire, and other is a short, thick, feminine in black attire. The medical workers ask over the sound transmission:<br/>
Who are you?<br/>
The two people reply:</p><p>	We came here to look at the bottom. </p><p>Everyone is dumbfounded.<br/>
Can you at least answer who are you? – asks Ann.<br/>
We are university professors at South Pole Physical Faculty. We came here to look at the bottom because 5 of the 6 pilots and 12 flight attendants were teachers at our university, and we came here to pay them respect. – the black figure says.<br/>
Hang on a second, how did you discover where this plane was before we did? -<br/>
We didn’t really, we were on the search saucer. We just descended faster to the bottom using TNT-powered sub.<br/>
Okay. If that is the case, could you please direct us to the plate with the tail number?<br/>
Sure. </p><p>The crewpeople eventually arrive at the place where 2 plates are lying. One says “Helderberg”, other reads out the determinant formula, and there is also a torn piece of the plate which begins with “Penisforce 747 Cha…”. They are surprised that it is far away from main wreckage, but they make a key discovery that plane broke-up mid-flight.<br/>
Have you seen orange boxes on which it says “Flight Recorder. Do Not Open”? – asks Shilen.<br/>
Yes.<br/>
That is good, please direct them to us, and we gotta notify Rennie because these are amazing news, brrh. – says Ann<br/>
The crew transcend an empty shread of ocean floor, and see the first recorder, cockpit voice recorder.<br/>
Flight data recorder is a bit farther away.<br/>
The people have went to the flight recorder and see the tail of the spaceplane, on which there was a large emblem with compound of 5 octahedra.<br/>
Ohh, there it is! – says Ann.<br/>
Then, the investigation is assembled in an spaceport hangar in Lakota City. The underwater searchers recovered the cargo hold area, and some areas in the passenger cabin. The large cost of operation has forced them to leave the rest behind. </p><p>On February 32, 8989, 1 year and 100 days after the plane crashed, the salvage work is complete. Van Zӛl decides to open the black boxes in the United States. While South Africa has its own facilities to open black boxes, Ren wanted the investigation to be as transparent as possible. Had he opened them in SA, he would be accused of cover-ups.<br/>
In addition, necrological team managed to fully recover the bodies of 6’412’151’981 of 7’682’468’511 passengers and 1500000 crew that were on board, including 24 of those of the YB members. </p><p>	We did the analysis on the passengers that Batzorig suspected to be smuggling shit. – says Annӛkӛ.<br/>
And what are the results?<br/>
The results are inconclusive, and have only 1.2% chance of being correct. We could not find any connection to a possible event that was scheduled to be thrown with feces, nor we could find a right-wing group to connect these people to.<br/>
Alright then. It seems like I will hand the investigation over to Eddie. Thanks for your work.</p><p>In the necrological, Annӛkӛ and Alys are examining the body of YB members recovered and Cherri. Alys introduce themselves:<br/>
I am a former executioner at a federal prison in Yule City, Titinota. And this scene with a body on the table reminds me of my job.<br/>
Woah. To me it is just another day.<br/>
Well, even though I am enby loving enby, my favourite people to execute were always female criminals. I just don’t know why this is the case. There is really something unique about watching a beautiful girl die.<br/>
And why did you quit your job? – Ann asks.<br/>
It was after El Al 1862 crash, when I found out about criminal case fabrications. In fact, my last inmate was actually tricked into conviction using mental pressure by police. This is when I just couldn’t do it anymore. – Alys explain in a somber, scrappy, downward voice. </p><p>Ann screams to the side: “Get the Kaleria here!”, and then asks:<br/>
How did you begin your job?<br/>
I am autistic and I had special interest in executing people. Keyword: Had. And oh wow.<br/>
The body of a dead, tanned girl lies on the table. Her hands and hair smoothly run across her body, and her closed eyelashes create a spell of death. Alys says:<br/>
This is amazing. Let’s check the chemical level.<br/>
The chemists take out a piece of flesh from Kaleria’s arm, and see that it is has a dark maroon color. The chemicals in the flesh are arbitium (9471) caeside, which shows a level of 71.4%. At this point, survival time is measured in 15 breaths.<br/>
Nine four seven one dash five five level seven one point four percent. – says Ellorianna, a chemist.<br/>
This confirms what Eddie said on TV. – says Alys.</p><p>	Arbitium caeside creates in rubidian mavka’s blood when carbon lifeforms burn. Since right-wing shit theory has been a failure so far, what else can possibly burn like this?<br/>
After analyzing the bodies of 23 other YB members, and over 10’000 people who were allocated the seats next to various fan inlets, the chemists present their findings to Eddie. After reading the report, Eddie, who is now the head of the investigation, speaks on TV about a new theory, which he calls The Meat Consumption Theory.</p><p>	We were examining the recovered bodies of people that were allocated seats next to recirculating fan inlets, and we have found traces of chemicals such as 9471 caeside, 1509 rubidite, 5511 lithide, 14991 per-418-chlorate, and other chemicals which created in these people’s blood when carbon lifeforms burn.<br/>
And how you rationalize this? – interviewer asks.</p><p>	The answer simply lies in the fact that the front right pallet of cargo was the seat of the fire, which was housing livestock animals. In meat industry, there are a lot of gases being released. In a massive spacecraft like this, gases compost, heat up, and more energy is contained than released.<br/>
Eddie makes a pause and says:</p><p>	When they reach cabin ceiling, they ignite into a flash fireball that takes over the whole compartment. This directs us to a cause of the plane crash being simple meat consumption by planetary species, but we have yet to determine why the fire started, because meat production waste doesn’t burn by itself neatly since it contains water.<br/>
Thank you.</p><p>During this time, Van Zӛl, who is no longer the head of investigation, listens to the cockpit voice recorder. CVRs record last 32 minutes of the flight, and 5 minutes of what happens to them after power is cut off. </p><p>When recording is started, the firm noise is heard. Then minutes tick. 1 minute. 2 minutes. 3 minutes. 5 minutes. 10 minutes. Rennie begins to get unsettled. At 13 minutes, there is a remark from first officer Tugai to increase the pressure in the cockpit, because he can’t stand small pressure. But it is muffled by noise.</p><p>15 minutes, 16 minutes, 17 minutes, 18 minutes, 19 minutes, … nothing. 21 minutes, 22 minutes, then a sudden, high-pitched squeal fills the room. Investigator Vandis av-Vanadis accidentally drops his tea as a result of sudden sound.</p><p>25 minutes, 26 minutes. Rennie begins to think that the hope of uncovering the reasons begins to fade. 28 minutes, then at 28:33, the smoke alarm sounds through noise. Ren exhales a breath of relief. The team listens to the recording:<br/>
Intercom chime. – says Asen.<br/>
What's going on now? – asks Dawie.<br/>
What? – Shinear asks<br/>
Cargo. – Ytaina says.<br/>
This came on now afterwards. – she adds.<br/>
Where is that? – asks Dawie.<br/>
Look at the light. – Ytaina adds.<br/>
Okay. – Dawie says.<br/>
Right rear quadrant. – Shinear supports.<br/>
And the alarm came on as well as (this too). – they also say.<br/>
Should I push the button over there? – Shinear asks.<br/>
Ja . . . Ja. – Dawie says.<br/>
This one's a different problem. – Asen says.<br/>
This light flared up as well. – Shinear says.<br/>
Then they hear the sound of cockpit door opening.<br/>
Huh? – Sөhөr asks when he enters the cockpit.<br/>
Is the general (fire) light on? – Ytaina asks.<br/>
Ja. – Dawie says.<br/>
Ccөthoer aft, dis die feit dat laila dijchӫd ӛӛngekom het . . . dit ijmsegtij mens. (Holy fuck, the fact that both came on ... it's terrifying.) – Ytaina says.<br/>
Intercom chime. – Stefan adds.<br/>
Ah shit . – Dawie says.</p><p>Then, an 800-Hz tone with noise sounds for the rest 5 minutes of the recording.<br/>
Rennie looks down at the table and says: “Well, at least we got to see the moment what happened when the fire alarm sounded. And this is before they contact Papey Gavna”.<br/>
So before they could contact Papey Gavna, fire already burnt through wires leading up to CVR?<br/>
Reading through the analysis of wreckage, that is right. – Michael Allis says.<br/>
And also judging by the intensity of the fire, by the time the crew has been alerted to the fire, it was too late.</p><p>Rennie thinks for some time and says later to the public:<br/>
At this point, I am ending my investigation. I give great thanks to the investigative team, and also I say thanks for the one and a half years together, and we are not going to fabricate anything. My explanations didn’t stand up, and my personal final opinion, that is not to be distributed as a fact, is that fire was intense enough to burn all the evidence of why it started. The end. </p><p>Edward Reese begins spinning his meat consumption theory forward. However, he faces some major obstacles.<br/>
There is a problem with this vegan theory. – says Skwleltkwe.<br/>
Okay, say it?<br/>
And the main problem is that plane’s skin has a very large melting point, and it is next to impossible to burn through skin of an airplane using a carbon-oxygen fire. If anything, these fires are never hotter than 1600 kelvin. Hell, our star is 3500 kelvin. – they explain.</p><p>	The fire could have grown much hotter if the materials that were housing these animals were involved. The wood, cardboard and plastic made of stars have very hot points of ignition. And once they are triggered by meat products, they ignite. – Eddie explains.</p><p>Eventually, the nature lover gives another interview:<br/>
The meat products combined with sheeting and packaging would reach temperatures exponentially, and eventually reach point where elements below iron start fusion, thus providing the fire with an element of heat. Simply put, molecules and atoms start burning, although this is incorrect to say from a discrete chemical standpoint.<br/>
Dave Consiglio adds his support.</p><p>	In fact, it is one of the major things that causes the loss of a civilization is usage of combustible fuels, and subsequent climate change. This type of change leads to loss of about 25 civilizations a year in our galaxy alone.</p><p>However, the investigators need their proof that this is what started the fire.</p><p>	I am starting to feel split from the situation. – Stellara adds. I know a series of farms which are about as dense as animals were packed in the Helderberg, and they don’t just burst into flames, for example Sadbury farm in North Dakota.</p><p>	Alright. But we can come to a conclusion that the main burning material was carbon lifeforms. </p><p>The idea that meant consumption brought down Flight 2020 begins gaining traction in vegan circles, and those who are vegans begin using the flight for their own gain. In fact, there was a 1% surge in veganism following Eddie’s statement.</p><p>Eddie eventually makes a final statement about the vegan theory.</p><p>	This is a theory that has a 26.96% chance of being correct, by our measures. When it comes to the theory, we believe that what had happened in the Helderberg’s cargo compartment was accelerated global warming. When the animals were housed in the Cham, son of Noah’s cargo area, this has resulted in a net increase in temperature, which created a chain reaction of global warming that eventually started into a fire. Due to lack of heat escape, the fire then transferred into the housings of the animals, and then it started a much faster chain reaction that eventually reached millions of degrees before burning through flight controls and downing the plane.<br/>
The interviewer asks, “Why is the theory 26.96% correct?”, and Eddie answers:<br/>
This is the malta number, or sum of alternating reciprocals of primes. In chemistry it is the probability of determining the cause of the fire from it’s products. Since it is 26.96% correct, the whole theory therefore is at a 26.96% chance of being correct.<br/>
And finally, the most burning question of all: Is this the final cause of the fire?<br/>
I would recommend writing it into the report and introducing safety measures based on this finding, but if more, …, stronger evidence is found, I will be happy to stop believing in this.</p><p>Interviewer then added: “Alright, thank you”. </p><p>Eventually the official investigation has been declared over. But rumors don’t die about the cause of the accident.<br/>
Investigative journalist Hanora Radix gives her insight:</p><p>-	During era from 431 to 117 million years ago, the star SA was divided between various countries. There were repressive and divisionary laws that were fueled by biology of the South African people. Whilst the South African stellar law didn’t have anything directly discriminatory, it was written in a way that skews interest towards biologically the “default” people – white cis straight men. The concept of “default person” permeated the society.<br/>
Anna from YoengBlood dance team decided to speak:</p><p>-	We are going to cancel shows in South Africa for an indefinite amount of time, either until the final cause of the crash is revealed, or when the dance team will revive.<br/>
Then, a darker piece of theory is found abruptly. </p><p>A South African chemist found a unique piece of evidence at the bottom of the cargo floor, next to divides between animals.<br/>
-	It is an iron particle with unique profile… - ze says. – This looks like the fire has it’s own oxygen.<br/>
The chemist presends his finding to other private investigations, and news spread. The fire that has it’s own oxygen is not a fire that would have started using carbon lifeforms, or accelerated global warming. </p><p>One of the experts who question the cause of the fire, is professor Derek Correy. He gives his interview:<br/>
-	This type of fire would involve materials that wouldn’t be normally carried aboard a spacecraft, that wouldn’t start a normal wood, cardboard, plastic fire. This would involve materials that are very unstable.</p><p>At the time, the star of South Africa was under an intergalactic embargo on certain list of chemicals, primary use of which is in torches, asteroid removal, fast fire, and welding.<br/>
-	However, these chemicals are also used by right-wing activists to set up massive demonstrations, in addition, they are also used in protests, and in, the most offensive part, attempts to alter sexuality.</p><p>In front of a Universe which has been developing to become better, Derek makes an incredibly blunt statement. </p><p>-	At the time in South Africa, but in South country especially, there was a need to build a rocket system that can shoot down harmful asteroids. And one of the major component of this substance is norium-lithic pertenessate  (5184Li)4TsO4. But it is not a substance that you would want carried aboard a spacecraft, particularly a passenger spacecraft. Because it is unstable, it carries it’s own oxygen, and it can burst into flames with vibration and any violent motion. This is what I believe has been carried on board the Helderberg.</p><p>Other theories are even more dark and disturbing. Some believe that substances carried aboard the Helderberg were designed to make fetuses cis and straight, some believed stuff that is too out of range to post here. </p><p>Hanora adds her explanation:<br/>
-	It was difficult for South Africa to fly a quasi-astronomical spaceline into different stars or galaxies, and pick up chemical contraband and abuse. SAA was seen as this surrogate carrier, that could, somewhere somehow, bring substances to fight asteroids or to edit fetuses, under cover, under protection, no questions asked.<br/>
The conspiracy theories are usual. There are tributes and memorials to 7684248511 peoplewho died in the crash. But the concept of “no solution” doesn’t come easy for families of those who died.<br/>
-	We need an answer for why we lost 24 members of our dancing team. – says Anna. – And I think that all the evidence combined eventually points to something illicit being on that flight.<br/>
SAA immediately stops using the 747 Cham, son of Noah. American officials also take notice. The FAA imposed new regulations on the Cham, but they would require weight increases, which essentially made the plane unviable. After attacks on September 11, 12732152001, the Cham was completely below the new safety regulations and production line ceased.<br/>
Eventually, at 116 Ma, a different, reconciled South African government decides to take a look. The Truth and Reconciliation Commission has determined that there was nothing in the official manifest that could have started the fire. This enabled Derek to push forward his theory, and many other theorists. </p><p>-	I believe this has exposed that the government version of what had happened, doesn’t stand up.<br/>
The Truth and Reconciliation Commission recommended that the people in charge should keep investigating the Helderberg crash.<br/>
-	But of course, that never happened! – Hanora says, - And we have to ask ourselves, why?<br/>
-	The simplest answer is that it would be financially disastrous for the spaceline. – Correy explains.<br/>
-	More complex answer is that it makes a benefit for the new government to hide the issues of old government. – says Hanora.</p><p>Anna of YoengBlood says:<br/>
-	I believe that there are still people today who know what happened to this flight. I get that maybe these people had problems with accepting themselves, they were also fighting asteroids, they were doing the best they could, but at least they could have a heart for the people who died onboard.<br/>
Rennie makes a final, post-investigational statement:</p><p>-	Unfortunately, we will never know. Unless someone comes up today and says, “Yes, I did this”, or “Yes, we are responsible”, and you can prove them, because terror companies like to claim responsibility, other than that we will never know.</p><p>Hanora says: “There is an old Russian saying that all secret eventually becomes visible.”</p><p>Edit 1: Changed the flight number from 2016 to 2020 because it feels as if the fanfic predicted the future.</p><p>Edit 2: Holy shit, the fanfic also predicted the "we can't breathe" thing. Wow...</p>
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